Strange Sex Laws

As reported on Netscape News

In Willowdale, Ore., it’s illegal for a husband to curse or swear during lovemaking. But a wife is allowed to whisper the identical naughty words in her hubby’s ear while in the act. --- don’t whisper sweet nothings in my ear!

In Indiana and Ohio, male skating instructors can’t have sexual relations with their female students. This atrocious misdeed, called “the seduction of female students” by the ludicrous legislation, is prosecuted as a felony. --- I knew there was a reason I never learned to skate!

In Harrisburg, Pa., female toll collectors can’t engage in sex with a truck driver in the confines of a booth. ---- well duh, have you seen the size of those toll booths?

It’s illegal in N.C. for a man to peep through a window at a women… yet it’s not against the law for a woman to peep into a room occupied by a man. --- Like we would care if a woman did peep!

In Branchville, S.C. couples who “lewdly and lasciviously associate, bed, and cohabit together, in a public or non-public place” can be punished with a $500 fine and as much as a 6-month prison term. ---– think they are trying to control the population boom in Branchville and I thought China has tough laws!

A gentleman can be incarcerated for from 1 to 10 years in an Arizona or Washington DC prison for causing his wife to be a prostitute. ---- just don’t charge guys.

It is illegal for any member of the Nevada legislature to conduct official business wearing a penis costume while the legislature is in session. --- ugh! You’ve got to be kidding me!

In Cali, Columbia, a woman may have sex only with her husband, and the first time this happens, her mother must be in the room to witness the act. ---- ummm but what happens if she is a MILF?

The penalty for pleasuring oneself in Indonesia is decapitation. ---- at least us guys could live without the head of our penis… but for you women…. That’s a steep price!

Can you believe this Kentucky state law? “No female shall appear in a bathing suit on any highway within this state unless she be escorted by at least two officers or unless she be armed with a club.” ---- little FYI for you women in Kentucky

The only acceptable sexual position in Washington, DC is the missionary position. Any other sexual position is illegal. ---- Had Clinton only know about this law huh.

So you think animal sex is illegal huh….. In Ventura County, Calif., cats and dogs are not allowed to have sex without a permit. – In Fairbanks, Alaska, a moose cannot have sex on city streets. – In Kingsville, TX., there is a law against two pigs having sex on the city’s airport property. ---- So see it is illegal for animal sex.

In Romboch, VA., it is illegal to engage in sexual activity with the lights on. --- I know where I’m not moving.

For those of us that partake in nooners ---- In Carlsbad, NM., it’s legal for couples to have sex in a parked vehicle during their lunch break from work, as long as the car or van has drawn curtains to keep strangers from peeking in. --- so if it’s the guys from the office peeking in, since there not strangers, it’s OK?

In Connorsville, Wis., it’s illegal for a man to shoot off a gun when his female partner has an orgasm. ----- heeeeeehawwwww! Git-r-done!

In the state of Washington, there is a law against having sex with a virgin under any circumstances (including the wedding night)… ummmm what if her mother is there?

A Tremonton, Utah, law states that no woman is allowed to have sex with a man while riding in an ambulance. In addition to pressing charges, the city publishes the woman’s name in the local newspaper. The man does not receive any punishment. ---- ever wonder why some of these laws came in to effect?

Bozeman, Mont., has a law that bans all sexual activity between members of the opposite sex in the front yard of a home after sundown… if they’re in the nude. ---- Just flip the skirt up honey, I can’t wait another second!

In Hastings, Neb., no couple, even if they are married, may sleep together in the nude. --- So do they go outside nude?

An ordinance in Newcastle, Wyo., specifically bans couples from having sex while standing inside a store’s walk-in meat freezer. ---- and George Costanza on Seinfeld thought he had problems from the water being to cold.

Coeur d’Alene, Idaho, police aren’t allowed to walk up and knock on a car window. Any officer who suspects that sex is taking place must drive up from behind, honk his horn 3 times, and wait approximately 2 minutes before getting out of his car to investigate. --- you mean some guys can last two minutes?

Another law in Helena, Mont., mandates that a woman can’t dance on a table in a saloon or bar unless she ahs on a least 3 pounds, 2 ounces of clothing. ---- Well the thong might… might cover the two ounces.

I know I just wasted however much time copying and pasting this when I could have been telling something juicy.... and I will. Was talking to someone the other day and we talked a little bit about bondage and the fact that I am in to some light stuff.... she wanted to know such as?.... so I'll share one of my favorite stories.... soon. =)